Mark Derwin: Jack Gaines
Bartleby Gaines : Uh, Dean Lewis why don't you tell them a little bit about the philosophy here at south Harmon?
Uncle Ben : Look, we throw a lot of fancy words in front of these kids in order to attract them to going to school in the belief that they're gonna have a better life, and we know that all were doing is breeding a whole new generation of buyers and sellers, BUYERS AND SELLERS! Pimps and whores, PIMPS AND WHORES! and indoctrinating them into a life long hell of debt and indecision!
Jack Gaines : I... I, I just don't understand...
Uncle Ben : DO I HAVE TO SPOON FEED IT TO YA? look, there's only one reason that kids want to go to school...
Bartleby Gaines : [quietly] Holy shit...
Jack Gaines : [after long pause] ... Which is?
Uncle Ben : ...To get a good job... To get a good job, with a great starting salary.
Jack Gaines : I couldn't agree more.
Diane Gaines : It is so refreshing to have somebody approach education so rationally!
Uncle Ben : Fuckin' A!
Jack Gaines : [on the phone] Tell me what classes you're taking?
Bartleby Gaines : [on the phone] Classes? Right, I'm taking
[sees kids playing craps]
Bartleby Gaines : statistics, and uhh
[sees kids dealing drugs]
Bartleby Gaines : business, and
[sees girl nearly taking her bikini off]
Bartleby Gaines : an... a... tomy...
Diane Gaines : Are you huffing?
Bartleby Gaines : Oh god.
Diane Gaines : Are you high?
Jack Gaines : You're huffing grass?
Bartleby Gaines : No I'm not huffing mom I'm not stoned I'm completely fine, infact I'm more clear and level headed than I've ever been.
Jack Gaines : Okay cut the crap Bartleby. Society has rules and the first rule is: You go to college. You wanna have a happy and successful life, you go to college. If you wanna be somebody, you go to college. If you wanna fit in, you go to college.
Bartleby Gaines : Well you know what maybe I didn't get into college!