Man of the House (2005) Poster

(I) (2005)

Paula Garcés: Teresa



  • Teresa : [Sharp has a pizza delivered at dinner, while the girls all have homemade salads]  What is that?

    Roland Sharp : The Carnivore. Pepperoni, sausage, ground beef, ham and olive loaf all gathered together in one savory pie. With jalepenos. Want some?

    Heather : Yes. No!

    Roland Sharp : Extra thick crust.

    Anne : I can't, I'm on the zone.

    Roland Sharp : What zone?

    Anne : The proper combination of protein, fat and carbohydrates.

    Roland Sharp : This combination here is proper as hell.

    Barb : I'm a total Atkins girl.

    Evie : I'm on Weight Watchers, you'll probably blow all your daily points with just one bite.

    Roland Sharp : This baby has one point and one point only, and that is tasting good.

  • Teresa : You *clearly* don't know how to speak to women.

    Roland Sharp : I know how to speak to women. I *clearly* choose not to.

  • Roland Sharp : [yelling at the radio]  Why do you find it necessary to listen to this constant *crap*?

    Anne : What's the matter? You don't like vagina music?

    Roland Sharp : Do you have to use that word before I've had my coffee and soymilk?

    Anne : [mocking him]  Vagina, vagina, *vagina*!

    Teresa : [walks in room]  Whose?

  • Roland Sharp : Furthermore, I'd appreciate it if you'd cover yourselves in our presence. I realize how very proud you are... of your tattoos, piercings, and other body modifications. However, my colleagues and I do not need to see these! Are there any questions?

    Teresa : I have one. Are you always such a dick?

    Roland Sharp : Yes!

  • Anne : We had the situation under control.

    Teresa : Yeah. We were about to go all Buffy on their gringo asses.

  • Teresa : I have to have my baby in America!

  • Teresa : I'll tell you something about this daughter of yours that you know nothing about, she must be severely messed up in the head from living with you.

    Roland Sharp : She lives with her mother.

    Evie : Why did your marriage fall apart?

    Roland Sharp : That is one of many things you and I will never discuss.

  • Anne : No, he means the other Texas Rangers, you know, like The Lone Ranger.

    Heather : He had that cool Indian friend, what was his name?

    Teresa : Tonto?

    Barb : He was hot! Why don't guys wear loincloths anymore?

  • Teresa : [advising Roland]  Remember, a woman is like a horse. She likes to know that the guy on the saddle has a tight grip on the reins.

    Heather : [frowns]  Excuse me, a woman is not a horse.

    [to Roland:] 

    Heather : Just be yourself.

    Anne : [smiling]  I'm not so sure that being himself is going in the right direction.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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