The First Wives Club (1996) Poster

Dan Hedaya: Morton Cushman



  • Brenda : Where's Shelly?

    Morty : In the car.

    Brenda : Glove compartment?

    Morty : Trunk.

  • Brenda : Morty! Well, look at you. You look prosperous.

    Morty : Brenda, don't embarrass me.

    Brenda : [Mocking Morty]  Don't embarrass you.

    Morty : Don't make a scene.

    Brenda : Don't make a scene.

    Morty : Do not make a scene.

    Brenda : Don't embarrass you! You've got a *nerve*! I'll tell you what's embarrassing!

    Morty : Keep your voice down.

    Brenda : Being hassled by Mr. Zaworsky... because I'm behind in the rent, *that's* embarrassing. Worrying about how I'm gonna get my kid through college, *that's* embarrassing!

    Morty : You know something? You *never* listen. For twenty years you never ever listened. Here,

    [grabs a yellow blouse] 

    Morty : honey why don't you try this one in a fitting room, looks very nice on you.

    Brenda : You know, I could use this. It's very beautiful and I love the color. But what am I gonna to use for money? HOW AM I GONNA PAY FOR IT?

    Morty : It's the *company* that is expanding. Don't you understand that? The *company*, not *me*! I'm a mere laborer!

    Brenda : You're a liar and a FRAUD!

    Morty : I have no money.

    Brenda : Really? Why don't you look in your purse?

    Morty : Oh you're very funny.

    Shelly : There stunning Morton, I need all of them.

    Brenda : Morton?

    Shelly : [covers her face with a dress]  Oh God, make it go away.

    Brenda : Shelly! Look at you! My my, the bulimia certainly has paid off.

    Morty : Don't start.

    Brenda : What's a matter Morty? Can't you buy her a whole dress?

    Shelly : Brenda, why don't you try these on in

    [holds out her arms] 

    Shelly : *your size*!

    Morty : It's really a delight running into you today Brenda.

  • Morty : Shelly, what happened here? $140,00 for a PLATE? $47,000 for a carpet? A USED carpet? $300,00 for a Lamborghini? Are you crazy?

    Shelly : I bought the car for you! It was only 300 grand! It was a GIFT!

    Morty : With my money you bought it! I bought me the gift!

    Shelly : Jesus, Morty, all I want is a lifestyle, y'know - with some ambiance and some classic eternal good taste!

  • Shelly : Gunilla Garson Goldberg, personally inviting me to one of her super-social luncheons!

    Morty : Why?

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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