You Can't Hurry Love (1988)
A comedy of a guy who is told the only way to be successful in LA is by "pretending to be someone else." Through a series of dates at a video dating service, he learns that isn't the case, and that it's better to be yourself, rather than what you think others want you to be. Based on the comedy short film "Video Valentino."
Eddie Hayes is new to Los Angeles who seeks to take a job to re-start his life after a failed relationship in his Ohio home town. His slacker cousin, Skip, sets him up with a job interview at an advertising company, headed by the eccentric Peter Newcomb, who instead hooks Eddie up with his punk half-brother Tony at a surfboard shop. Eddie meets a potential new girlfriend, named Peggy Kellogg, who works for a dating service which Eddie decides to moonlight as a director of low-budget TV commercials for the dating service to be close to Peggy. Will Eddie hook up with Peggy despite the fact that she has a boyfriend, and engaged?
- Over the opening credits, Eddie Hayes (David Packer) arrives in Los Angeles, California, from Ohio, after his fiancee left him on their wedding day to elope with his best man. He arrives by taxi at a large mansion where Eddie's cousin, Skip Dooley (Scott McGinnis), offers to let Eddie stay in the mansion he is house sitting. When Eddie sees a photographer and models in the backyard, Skip tells him the house is owned by advertising agency Vidiocity Advertising Concepts. After Eddie is settled in, Skip arranges a job interview for him with Peter Newcomb (David Leisure), an executive at Vidiocity. Newcomb informs Eddie there are no openings at Vidiocity, but his brother, Tony, may hire him to advertise his business at the beach.
Eddie finds Tony (Anthony Geary) at Skate City, a beach equipment rental kiosk at Santa Monica beach, where the advertising job is nothing more than passing out fliers. Reluctantly, Eddie takes the job. As Eddie hands out fliers, a jogger runs into him, scattering the heralds. As he picks them up, Peggy Kellogg (Bridget Fonda), a woman sitting on a nearby bench, helps him. Afterward, she hands Eddie her business card for Video Valentine Dating Service, and tells him that if he needs a date, she could help him. Eddie asks if she would go out with him. Peggy tells Eddie that she does not date potential clients. When her brother, Tim (Tim Ryan), arrives and places his arm around her shoulders, Eddie mistakenly thinks Tim is Peggy's boyfriend.
The next day, Eddie sees Skip and complains about Peter Newcomb's job. However, Skip tells his cousin that Los Angeles is not like Ohio, and that if he pretends to be successful, people will believe him. Skip tells Eddie he needs to start dating again. Eddie works, and flirts with women at the beach, but he is constantly rejected. Later, he goes to Vidiocity for his paycheck and asks Peter Newcomb for a promotion, but is turned down.
While waiting for the elevator, Eddie overhears a woman rehearsing lines for a video dating profile. Following her, Eddie arrives at Video Valentine Dating Service and sees Peggy. After she gives him sample videotapes to view, Eddie decides to make one. Recorded by Peggy and her boss, Miss Frigget (Lu Leonard), Eddie takes Skip's advice, and declares he is a television commercial director. His video elicits a telephone call from Glenda (Judy Balduzzi).
That evening, Eddie arrives at Glenda's house and finds her dressed like the pop singer Madonna. During their date, Glenda tells Eddie she is a dancer, and asks if he might hire her for one of his commercials. Before he takes her home, Glenda gives Eddie her casting photograph. The next day, Eddie sees Peggy and Tim at the beach. When asked about his date, Eddie tells Peggy it was bad. However, she insists there are plenty of other women on the dating service.
Eddie returns to Video Valentine and records a new video message, this time claiming to be in a rock and roll band. After watching Eddie's introductory video, performance artist Rhonda (Kristy McNichol) asks him out to a club. During their date, a drug dealer gives Eddie something that causes him to pass out. Eddie awakens at Rhonda's with manacles attached to his ankles. Holding a crossbow, Rhonda tells Eddie she is recording him as part of her piece, titled, "The Mating Ritual." She fires the crossbow, but Eddie escapes.
Returning to Video Valentine the next day, he creates yet another video, pretending he likes thrills and danger. Eddie's parents, Chuck and Macie Hayes (Frank Bonner and Luana Anders), pay a surprise visit. Seeing the state of the mansion and the scantly clad models walking around, Chuck and Macie demand Eddie return to Ohio and stop living a life of debauchery. Suddenly, Skip arrives and tells his uncle and aunt that he and Eddie are recording a practical joke television show with hidden cameras. Eddie is surprised when his parents believe Skip, and offer to take Eddie out for dinner that evening.
Later that afternoon, Monique (Merete Van Kamp) asks Eddie on a date based on his thrill-seeking video. When he tries to reschedule because of his dinner plans, Monique invites herself along. During dinner, Monique fondles Eddie under the table as Chuck and Macie talk about Eddie's childhood. When Eddie excuses himself to go to the restroom, Monique follows him and says she wants to make love, but Eddie dissuades her. After dinner, Monique takes Eddie to a swimsuit boutique and asks him again to make love to her. While Eddie kisses her, Monique opens the store window curtains so people on the street can watch. When Eddie strips, a police officer arrests him for public indecency.
The next day, Eddie's parents and Skip bail him out of jail. Disappointed, Macie announces she will be calling Skip's mother to inform her about Skip's Los Angeles lifestyle and his bad influence on Eddie. After Chuck and Macie leave, Skip tells Eddie that Vidiocity is having a party at the mansion. To get a date for the party, Eddie records a new video profile, and pretends to be urbane and rich.
On the evening of the party, Eddie is talking to his date, Tracey (Danitza Kingsley), when he sees Peggy and Tim. After Tracey excuses herself to make a telephone call, Peggy tells Eddie she will be sorry not to see him at Video Valentine, as he seems to have found his perfect match. Skip mentions that Kelly Bones (Sally Kellerman), head of Vidiocity's New York City office, has just arrived and Eddie should talk to her about getting a better job. As Kelly talks to Peter Newcomb, Eddie introduces himself as Vidiocity's head of "alternate media." Newcomb explains that he only passes out fliers, but Eddie tells Kelly he worked at another advertising firm in Ohio. When Kelly asks if it was Pinky and Chico, Eddie lies and says it was. She informs him that Pinky and Chico are her dogs' names. However, she likes Eddie and asks him to attend the Monday morning staff meeting. Afterward, Peggy tells him he would be happier if he stopped pretending to be someone he is not.
Later, Eddie leads Tracey to his bedroom and confesses he is not rich. Tracey tells him she does not care and asks him to make love to her. Just then, Tracey's boyfriend, Sparky (Jake Steinfeld), arrives after receiving Tracey's telephone call that she is with another man to just make him jealous. Sparky beats Eddie up, and then leaves with Tracey.
In the morning, Skip tells Eddie that his parents have cut him off from his trust fund and he needs to think of way to make money without working. Seeing that Skip's way of life has not been working for him, Eddie goes to Video Valentine one last time. For his latest video, Eddie decides to be himself, and says he wants to fall in love without having to pretend with anyone.
Later, we see that Skip has a new job as a limousine driver. After Eddie congratulates his cousin, he tells Skip he is leaving Los Angeles to return to Ohio. Skip asks him to reconsider, because the telephone has been ringing all day from women who saw Eddie's Video Valentine profile. There is even a message from Peggy saying she likes the real Eddie. Hearing Peggy's message, Eddie realizes he likes her too. Skip drives Eddie to the Video Valentine office, but a note on the door says they are closed for a wedding at St. Martin's Church. Thinking the wedding is for Peggy and Tim, Skip and Eddie drive to the church.
At the altar, Eddie tells Tim he wants to ask Peggy out on a date. Tim says sure, and Peggy admits that Tim is her brother. When Eddie asks about the wedding, Peggy tells him she is only a bridesmaid for Miss Frigget's wedding. Relieved, Eddie asks Peggy to go out with him. She says yes, and they kiss to the applause of wedding guests.