The Castaway Cowboy (1974)
Lincoln Costain: Where are you going Battan?
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Awe shucks, what's the use, I can't get the dang thing to work anyhow.
Lincoln Costain: In my outfit we don't quit until it's too dark to work or time to eat. I didn't hear the dinner bell - did you?
Henrietta MacAvoy: Mr. Bryson tells me it's impossible to load cattle onto boats in these waters.
Calvin Bryson: It was tried once on the big island two ships ran on reefs and there's no anchorage further out.
Lincoln Costain: Don't they have docks in Alleah?
Calvin Bryson: Never needed them."
Lincoln Costain: Well how do they load then?
Calvin Bryson: Mostly by long boat. Can you imagine trying to load cattle by long boat?
Lincoln Costain: Well, there's got to be a way, there always is, it's just a matter of finding it.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Mr. Costain says there ain't never been a horse that ain't been rode and never been a rider that ain't been throwed.
Calvin Bryson: Well, I won't challenge the statement but I will the grammar.
Lincoln Costain: Grammar never was my strong suit.
Calvin Bryson: Young man you are sprouting up like a weed.
Lincoln Costain: At least he's got good rock candy.
Lincoln Costain: 10,000 acres huh, that's a good size pea patch even where I come from.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Where's that?
Lincoln Costain: Texas. There you can ride a month in any direction and never touch a fence.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: It must be beautiful.
Lincoln Costain: Oh, it is.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Costain, do you think you could ever like it here?
Lincoln Costain: No, no nah. This fruit bowl ain't for me. Some people might like it just fine, though.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Suppose you're going back to Texas huh?
Lincoln Costain: You bet
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Got a wife there?
Lincoln Costain: Haven't met the woman who could afford me.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Then you never did have one.
Lincoln Costain: Nope, had the small pox once though, amounts to the same thing.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Yea, guess you never wanted to settle down with any woman no matter how nice they were huh.
Lincoln Costain: That's about right Yeah.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: But you can't have kids if you ain't married.
Lincoln Costain: Yeh, ain't that a mercy?
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: What are you gonna you do when you get old?
Lincoln Costain: Die I guess.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: I mean before that, who'll take care of you if you don't have a son?
Lincoln Costain: I'll say one thing for you - you get a notion you sure hang on to it, Burton.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Booton.
Lincoln Costain: Oh yeah.
Henrietta MacAvoy: Yes, it's true they do like their fun.
Lincoln Costain: They'd rather giggle than laugh, they'd rather laugh than eat they're like a bunch of kids out there. A school girl would be more sober mam'm.
Lincoln Costain: What is it boy? What's the matter?
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: It's one of the animals, a big one. He's eatin' up the vegetables again.
Henrietta MacAvoy: Get out of there. Get out of my garden, do you hear me? Get out!
Lincoln Costain: One of the animals, woe doggey, you didn't tell me you had cattle around here, Button
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Booton. We don't that thing's wild but I sure hope he eats the turnips!
Lincoln Costain: He may be wild, but he ain't no thing. That's about a thousand pounds of prime bull out there.
Henrietta MacAvoy: You willful, worthless, misbegotten beast!
Lincoln Costain: That's a right nice vocabulary Ms. McEvoy but you'll never talk him out of there...
Lincoln Costain: Where are they?
Kimo: Boys not tell me, boss. Maybe they go work someplace else, yes?
Lincoln Costain: Yeah, yeah, maybe it'll snow this afternoon too, but I doubt it.
Henrietta MacAvoy: You just can't expect to change a whole culture overnight.
Lincoln Costain: I don't have the least notion of changing it. If you'll just give me my wages I won't be troubling you any further.
Henrietta MacAvoy: You know, it is Sunday. They're entitled to some recreation.
Lincoln Costain: There just ain't any Sundays when it's roundup until the job gets done.
Henrietta MacAvoy: Well, maybe if you met them halfway they would be able...
Lincoln Costain: Ma'am there aren't any halfways in the cattle business. It would be easier to make a cherry pie out of barbed wire than to make a cowboy out of the best of the lot of them. They just ain't cut out for workin'.
Henrietta MacAvoy: Booton says they're really trying.
Lincoln Costain: That's whats so frightening, they are.
Henrietta MacAvoy: But if they're showing progress...
Lincoln Costain: They aren't showing progress, they're just trying. It ain't the same thing.
Lincoln Costain: Hey, you know, I think I sold them boys short when I said they couldn't drive a hot nail in a snow bank. I think they could, I really think they could. Henrietta, what are you cryin' about?
Henrietta MacAvoy: I don't know, I guess I never really believed it would happen.
Capt. Cary: You made a believer out of me, Costain. Mrs., here's your money. Coin of the realm. I'm offering a mate's pay for anyone who'll nursemaid those cows back to California...
Lincoln Costain: Well, that's my chance to get back to Texas. I don't know, Captain, that's right temptin' but I don't think I can leave Mrs. McEvoy with them pineapple cowboys. I mean they'd drive her dingy and I'm about the only one around who knows how to handle them.
Capt. Cary: Well, suit yourself, lad, and I don't blame you but I've got to get them cattle to California. Thank you, both of you.
Henrietta MacAvoy: Good-bye. Then you are going to stay, at least for a while, Linc.
Lincoln Costain: Well for a while, yeah, for a while, you know,till they get the hang of it then I'm gonna get off this flower pot.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Mamma! Mamma!
Henrietta MacAvoy: Good heavens, we're right here
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Tarnation Mamma I swam one of those critters out just as smooth as butter. Did you see?
Henrietta MacAvoy: Of course we did, dear, and nobody could have done it better.
Lincoln Costain: Aww, well now that's a little thick don't you think? Ain't nobody gonna pin a rose on you just for doing your job. You remember that, Booton.
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: Ma, Ma, he called me by my right name! Did you hear him? He said it for the first time!
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: How do you feel?
Lincoln Costain: Well, I've... I've felt worse. I just can't remember when.
Lincoln Costain: Where are we?
Booton 'Little Maca' MacAvoy: In Mom's spare bedroom.
Lincoln Costain: No. Where in the world are we?