Joel Grey: Master of Ceremonies
Master of Ceremonies : Outside it is windy, but inside it is so hot, every night we have ze battle to keep the girls from taking off all their clothing. So don't go away, who knows? Tonight we may lose the battle!
Master of Ceremonies : [singing] Wilkommen, bienvenue, welcome, im cabaret, au cabaret, to cabaret!
Master of Ceremonies : In here, life is beautiful. The girls are beautiful. Even the orchestra is beautiful!
[Curtains pull back to reveal an all-girl band]
Master of Ceremonies : Leave your troubles outside! Life is disappointing? Forget it!