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Cat Ballou (1965) Poster

(1965)

Quotes

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Jackson Two-Bears: Kid, Kid, what a time to fall off the wagon. Look at your eyes.

Kid Sheleen: What's wrong with my eyes?

Jackson Two-Bears: Well they're red, bloodshot.

Kid Sheleen: You ought to see 'em from my side.

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Kid Sheleen: Guns, bottles, fists, knives, clubs - all the same to me. All the same to you?

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Jackson Two-Bears: He's a murderer, a hired killer. His nose was bit off in a fight.

Frankie Ballou: If I was gonna be scared, I'd be scared of the fella who bit it off, not him!

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[after a drunken Kid Sheleen shoots at a target on the barn]

Clay Boone: He did it! He missed the barn!

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Cat: Some gang! An Indian ranch hand, a drunken gunfighter, a sex maniac, and an uncle!

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Clay Boone: I've never seen a man get through a day so fast.

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Clay Boone: We can't hold up the train.

Cat: Why not?

Clay Boone: Lots of reasons.

Cat: Name 'em.

Clay Boone: We're rustlers, not train robbers.

Cat: Well, if people didn't try something new, there wouldn't be hardly any progress at all.

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Jed: [to Cat, on the train] Ma'am, I apologize for my disgusting condition and I assure you I will not inflict myself on you any further.

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Kid Sheleen: At first you don't think you can stand to get hit, then you realize you can take it 'cause the blood don't matter, and you know you're gonna live. It's a great gift I'm goin' to give you - to know it don't hurt to fight!

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Kid Sheleen: Let's have a drink for old times' sake.

Butch Cassidy: Old times' sake? That means you got no cash.

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Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] She has the smile of an angel.

The Sunrise Kid: [singing] Fights like the devil.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] The eyes of an angel.

The Sunrise Kid: [singing] Bites like the devil.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] The face of an angel.

The Sunrise Kid: [singing] I say, she's the devil.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] She's mean and evil through and through.

The Sunrise Kid: Cat Ballou.

Professor Sam The Shade: Cat Ballou.

Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] She's mean and evil through and through.

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Cat: Jackson, what's happening?

Jackson Two-Bears: It's ghost sickness.

Cat: What's that?

Jackson Two-Bears: In this Indian religion, see, we believe what the gods did when they made a man crazy was they made him fall in love.

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Frankie Ballou: Well now, there's a game for a sheriff - liar's poker. We got our unemployed off the street and made Wolf City safe all in one brilliant stroke.

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Kid Sheleen: Yeah, it's all over in Dodge. Tombstone, too; Cheyenne, Deadwood, all gone, all dead and gone. Why, the last time I came through Tombstone, the big excitement there was about the new rollerskate rink that they had laid out over the OK Corral. I'll tell you something else, I used to work for the Buffalo Bill Wild West Show and a Congress of Rough Riders. And I rescued many stagecoach passengers from road agents and drunkard injuns... in the nick of time! Twice a day, three times on Saturday.

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Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [both Sam The Shade and The Sunrise Kid - as narrators/singers] Round and round and round they went, 'til man and gal and beast were spent. Round and round and round they rode... Oh, what an episode!

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Sir Harry Percival: [shows her the bedroom on the train] This is the master bedroom. Do you approve?

Cat: Oh, it's swell. A regular Tintoretto!

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Cat: [Looks at Frankie Ballou, lying in coffin]

Cat: Why is he smiling like that? My father never smiled like that in his whole life?

Cat: [looks in coffin again, apalled]

Undertaker: Well, he's going to smile like that forever, now. Courtesy of the Wolf City Development Company.

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Jed: Build you life anew, ma'am. This studyin' on revenge is just turnin' your back on the future and lettin' the dead past eat at your heart.

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Cat: [Returning to the Hole in the Wall after the train robbery] We did it, Mr. Cassidy. My gang! It's just the beginning. We'll wipe out Wolf City! You help me and I'll make you rich.

Butch Cassidy: [Reading the payroll bags] Wolf City Development. Property: H. Percival. She stole their payroll, Hedda.

Cat: Of course.

Butch Cassidy: You ever hear of Mr. Sir Harry Percival? He owns Wolf City Development, which owns Wolf City... which lets us alone. We don't bother them nor Sir Harry Percival, and they don't bother us.

Cat: Sir Harry Percival. That's the man I should be after.

Butch Cassidy: How you gonna find him?

Cat: You won't help us?

Butch Cassidy: Cut our own throats?

Cat: Hole in the Wall's impregnable.

Butch Cassidy: No such thing. It's more trouble than we're worth to dig us out. Now you made it worthwhile!

Cat: Some gang of cutthroats and murderers. We used to whisper your names when we were kids - scared to say them out loud. How sad - you got old.

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[Jackson slugs Clay]

Clay Boone: Well, what was that for?

Jackson Two-Bears: Well, everyone else was doin' it. I got the right to share in the fun without regard to race, creed or color according to the Fourteenth Amendment.

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Cat: Sir Harry Percival, I presume.

Sir Harry Percival: Really, roughing it on the frontier - how delightful!

Cat: Oh, you like our wide open spaces?

[Cat remove her cape to reveal a very low cut dress]

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[first lines]

Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] Well now friends just lend an ear for you're now about to hear the Ballad of Cat Ballou.

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Cat: Mrs. Parker didn't introduce us, I'm Catherine Ballou.

Jed: I'm drunk as a skunk.

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Cat: What am I gonna do?

Jackson Two-Bears: They got a gun fighter. You get a gun fighter.

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Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] There are tear drops in her heart but they can't make her cry. / There are tear drops in her heart but they can't make her cry. / She's lost all the kin that she's known, and the tears will turn into stone / All the teardrops in her heart, 'cause they can't make her cry.

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Cat: You won't make me cry. You'll never make me cry!

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Sir Harry Percival: A little wine with music...

[Sir Harry winds his gramophone]

Sir Harry Percival: ...a little Nineteenth Century science, Stone Age atmosphere, Cave Man passion...

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Cat: I thought you were lying.

Clay Boone: You mean I wasn't?

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Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] Then there came to town, a gun deadly and frightening / A gun quicker than lightening, fasted gun you've seen. / It was the gun in the hand of Eli 'Kid' Sheleen.

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Jackson Two-Bears: [after slugging someone during a brawl] Sholom Aleichem!

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Kid Sheleen: Cut your throat, Cassidy!

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Sheriff Cardigan: [the Sheriff comes to take Cat Ballou to the gallows] Well, it's time. Come on, don't just dawdle. Everybody's waiting.

Cat: Waiting?

Sheriff Cardigan: Looking forward to it, I might say.

Cat: I'm sorry they don't like me.

Sheriff Cardigan: You can't blame them, can you? Killing Sir Harry put the kibosh on the whole slaughterhouse. No jobs. No payroll. You took the bread out of half the mouths of Wolf City. You haven't got any friends.

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Cat: Oh, look at that: a painting on the ceiling!

Sir Harry Percival: Oh, yes. That's a Tintoretto.

Cat: I'll say it is.

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[last lines]

Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] So she rode away, just where now is a mystery, / But Cat rode into history and her legend grew. / She was the Queen of the outlaws, / Her Highness Cat Ballou. / Cat Ballou, Cat Ballou. / Well, our story now is through.

The Sunrise Kid: [singing] Cat Ballou.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] Cat Ballou.

Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] We'll say farewell to Cat Ballou.

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Cat: And the first time I ask you to do something for me, like rob one little train!

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Kid Sheleen: [sniffs at the faint smell of liquor] I smell a water hole!

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Cat: Where are you staying?

Jed: On the run, ma'am. Hiding out in a crowd.

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Frankie Ballou: You'd like a drink better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stub, wouldn't you?

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Cat: They're trying to drive him off his ranch! They put manure in his well, they made him talk to lawyers...

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Jed: Ma'am, I can understand your objection to rustlin' - a girl with your background and gentle upbringing - but it's the only way we can raise money.

Cat: No it's not.

Clay Boone: Well, what do you think we ought to do that's fittin' and proper?

Cat: Rob a train.

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Clay Boone: I think we'll go to St. Louis.

Cat: St. Louis?

Clay Boone: Yeah, St. Louis! City on the Missouri, railhead of the Santa Fe, jump off for the Oregon Trail - producers of beef, beer, shoes and, ah, good times.

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Frankie Ballou: [coming home from a drunken brawl] ... and some of them, the very few, Stay pickled 'til they're ninety-twoooo!

[literally falls off the wagon]

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Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] Cat Ballou, wicked through and through / They'll now be hanging Cat Ballou.

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Cat: What are you doing here?

Clay Boone: Looking for you.

Cat: But you're an outlaw.

Clay Boone: Sure am! Got a price on my head!

Cat: Shh...

Clay Boone: Twenty five dollars for Jed, thirty five dollars for me. Ha ha!

Jed: I want to thank you ma'am for all your help with my nephew and I.

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Cat: You killed my Father!

Sheriff Cardigan: Oh, that can't be. He's been sitting right there all morning.

Cat: No, I saw him.

Man #1: He hasn't been out that rocker all morning long.

Man #2: It's a fact.

Cat: Why do you say that?

Sheriff Cardigan: Just telling the truth.

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Cat: All right! You all say you love me and are beholden to me, and "take it easy Cat. We're gonna take care of you!"

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Clay Boone: Come on, jump.

Jed: Jump?

Clay Boone: Jump!

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Kid Sheleen: [to Cat] Oh, it was just swell! Just the way I figured it'd be.

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Kid Sheleen: [to Jackson] See ya later, son.

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Cat: Why do men always think marriage is the only thing on a woman's mind?

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Sir Harry Percival: [Cat Ballou, masquerading as Trixie, has just pulled her Derringer pistol on him] My wallet is in the top drawer. But you'll never get away with this, Trixie.

Cat: My name isn't Trixie, Sir Harry. It's Catherine. And I'm Frankie Ballou's daughter.

Sir Harry Percival: So *you're* Cat Ballou, huh?

Cat: [pulls out a document] Sign this.

Sir Harry Percival: What is it?

Cat: A confession that you ordered the hiring of Tim Strawn - and are responsible for the murder of my father. Sign it!

Sir Harry Percival: [crosses his arms, chuckles casually] And if I refuse to sign it?

Cat: I'll kill you!

Sir Harry Percival: Now, why do I doubt that?

Cat: [with even more conviction] Don't you doubt it, Sir Harry.

Sir Harry Percival: But I do. I don't think you have it in you, Miss Ballou.

Sir Harry Percival: Give me that gun.

[a brief struggle ensues. A shot is fired, Sir Harry falls to the floor, fatally wounded]

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Cat: Jackson, what's happening?

Jackson Two-Bears: It's ghost sickness.

Cat: What's that?

Jackson Two-Bears: In this Indian religion, see, we believe what the gods did when they made a man crazy was they made him fall in love.

Cat: Well, that's very poetic, Jackson. But what does that have to do with us? Who's in love? And with who?

Jackson Two-Bears: [correcting her grammar] With "whom."

Jackson Two-Bears: [chuckles] Well, now, that's another question.

Cat: Jackson, what am I gonna' do?

Jackson Two-Bears: Ain't much you can do about it. I reckon I'll see you later, ma'am.

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Jackson Two-Bears: Don't call me 'Lo'!

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Clay Boone: What's your name, so I can vote for you in the next election?

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Cat: Jackson?

Jackson Two-Bears: Yeah...?

Cat: Oh, Jackson.

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Cat: Stay here with us. There's somebody trying to kill my father.

Jed: No.

Clay Boone: Jed...

Cat: Jed.

Jed: We'll stay, ma'am, it'll be our pleasure to do what we can.

Cat: We don't need him them.

Clay Boone: I think you do. My Uncle here ain't never shot at a man. It's against his principles.

Cat: Is that true?

Jed: Oh yes, ma'am, that's true. Neither has he.

Clay Boone: But we'll stay and do what we can. As long as there ain't no trouble.

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Jed: Hold on. ma'am.

Clay Boone: Listen, Miss Ballou.

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Clay Boone: Hit him! Hit him! Hit him!

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Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [opening scene, singing] Well now friends. Just lend an ear, for you're now about to hear. The Ballad of Cat Ballou. It's a song that's newly made. And Professor Samuel Shade, and the Sunrise Kid are singing it for you. Cat Ballou-u-u. Cat Ballou-u-u. Cat Ballou-u-u.

Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] It's a hanging day in Wolf City, Wyoming. Wolf City, Wyoming in 1894. They're gonna drop Cat Ballou. Through that gallows' floor.

Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] She killed a man ln Wolf City, Wyoming. Wolf City, Wyoming. Killed a man, it's true. And that is why they're hanging. Hanging Cat Ballou.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] She has the smile of an angel.

The Sunrise Kid: Fights like the devil.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] The eyes of an angel.

The Sunrise Kid: Bites like the devil.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] The face of an angel.

The Sunrise Kid: I say she's the devil.

Professor Sam The ShadeThe Sunrise Kid: [singing] She's mean and evil through and through. Cat Ballou. Cat Ballou-u-u. She's mean and evil through and through.

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Singing Tart: [singing] I'm bent and gray. And I've lost the way. All my tomorrows were yesterday! I traded them off for a wanton's pay.

Professor Sam The Shade: [singing] You bartered your graces for silks and for laces.

Singing Tart: [singing] My heart I sold for a pot of gold.

Professor Sam The ShadeSinging Tart: [singing] And now I/you am/are old!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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