Most Disappointing Nudity

by Kroshaw | created - 03 May 2018 | updated - 04 May 2018 | Public

We have all had that experience. The one where you finally see that hot actor or actress get naked in a film, only for the exposure to elicit a reaction ranging from "oh well, never mind..." to "oh my god, no!".

Of course, for this question, I am just talking about movies. If were were talking about magazine shoots, paparazzi shots, etc we could include people like Janice Dickinson, Kate Middleton, etc.

Which actors/actresses should have kept their clothes on in these films? Vote for the one that provokes your biggest "arghhh!" reaction :)

Discuss this poll here

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1. In the Cut (2003)

R | 119 min | Mystery, Thriller

46 Metascore

New York City writing professor, Frannie Avery, has an affair with a police detective, who is investigating the murder of a beautiful young woman in her neighborhood.

Director: Jane Campion | Stars: Meg Ryan, Mark Ruffalo, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Michael Nuccio

Votes: 21,327 | Gross: $4.75M

Meg Ryan should have kept her clothes on.

2. Breathless (1983)

R | 100 min | Action, Drama, Romance

52 Metascore

When Jesse Lujack steals a car in Las Vegas and drives down to LA, his criminal ways only escalate- but when will it end?

Director: Jim McBride | Stars: Richard Gere, Valérie Kaprisky, Art Metrano, John P. Ryan

Votes: 8,125 | Gross: $19.91M

Richard Gere coming up a bit short.

3. Heaven's Prisoners (1996)

R | 132 min | Drama, Mystery, Thriller

A hardened New Orleans cop, Dave Robicheaux, finally tosses in the badge and settles into life on the bayou with his wife. But a bizarre plane crash draws him back into the fray when his family is viciously threatened.

Director: Phil Joanou | Stars: Alec Baldwin, Kelly Lynch, Mary Stuart Masterson, Eric Roberts

Votes: 4,879 | Gross: $5.01M

Sorry Teri Hatcher, no, they are not "spectacular".

4. I Really Hate My Job (2007)

Not Rated | 90 min | Comedy, Drama

'Every day is another day closer to the day I'll never have to do this again.' Five women, one restaurant, one night, one birthday, one breakdown. Then the phone rings. A famous actor is ... See full summary »

Director: Oliver Parker | Stars: Neve Campbell, Shirley Henderson, Alexandra Maria Lara, Anna Maxwell Martin

Votes: 1,096

Neve Campbell was underwhelming.

5. DOA: Dead or Alive (2006)

PG-13 | 87 min | Action, Adventure

38 Metascore

The world's best fighters are invited to DOA, an invitational martial arts contest. There, four female rival fighters will have to work together to uncover the secret that the organizer of the tournament is trying to hide.

Director: Corey Yuen | Stars: Jaime Pressly, Devon Aoki, Sarah Carter, Holly Valance

Votes: 42,599 | Gross: $0.48M

A let-down from Holly Valance.

6. About Schmidt (2002)

R | 125 min | Comedy, Drama

85 Metascore

A recently retired man embarks on a journey to his estranged daughter's wedding, only to discover more about himself and life than he ever expected.

Director: Alexander Payne | Stars: Jack Nicholson, Hope Davis, Dermot Mulroney, Kathy Bates

Votes: 120,401 | Gross: $65.02M

No list like this would be complete without Kathy Bates.

7. Daisy Diamond (2007)

94 min | Drama

A tragic story about Anna who dreams of one thing only: making it as an actress. She moves from Sweden to Copenhagen to pursue her dream. But fate has something else in store for her. ... See full summary »

Director: Simon Staho | Stars: Noomi Rapace, Thure Lindhardt, Benedikte Hansen, Morten Kirkskov

Votes: 1,150

Please Noomi Rapace, enough nudity, thanks.

8. Trainspotting (1996)

R | 93 min | Drama

83 Metascore

Renton, deeply immersed in the Edinburgh drug scene, tries to clean up and get out, despite the allure of the drugs and influence of friends.

Director: Danny Boyle | Stars: Ewan McGregor, Ewen Bremner, Jonny Lee Miller, Kevin McKidd

Votes: 617,514 | Gross: $16.50M

Hey, Ewan McGregor, it must be cold in Scotland.

9. The Sessions (2012)

R | 95 min | Biography, Comedy, Drama

79 Metascore

A man in an iron lung who wishes to lose his virginity contacts a professional sex surrogate with the help of his therapist and priest.

Director: Ben Lewin | Stars: John Hawkes, Helen Hunt, William H. Macy, Moon Bloodgood

Votes: 40,635 | Gross: $6.00M

Helen Hunt waits until 48 to get fully nude.

10. Catchfire (1990)

R | 116 min | Action, Comedy, Crime

A witness to a mob assassination flees for her life from town to town, switching identities, but cannot seem to elude Milo, the chief killer out to get her.

Director: Dennis Hopper | Stars: Dennis Hopper, Jodie Foster, Dean Stockwell, Vincent Price

Votes: 3,224

Jodie Foster puts paid to any fantasies.

11. S.O.B. (1981)

R | 122 min | Comedy, Drama

62 Metascore

A movie producer who made a huge flop tries to salvage his career by revamping his film as an erotic production, where its family-friendly star takes her top off.

Director: Blake Edwards | Stars: Julie Andrews, William Holden, Marisa Berenson, Larry Hagman

Votes: 5,277 | Gross: $14.87M

Mary Poppins, topless, aged 45... arghhh!

12. Striptease (1996)

R | 115 min | Comedy, Crime, Drama

37 Metascore

A stripper and single mother gets dragged into a dangerous situation after a congressman takes a fancy to her.

Director: Andrew Bergman | Stars: Demi Moore, Burt Reynolds, Armand Assante, Ving Rhames

Votes: 41,707 | Gross: $33.11M

Demi Moore - The case against breast enhancements.

13. The Deuce (2017–2019)

TV-MA | 60 min | Drama

A look at life in New York City during the 1970s and '80s when porn and prostitution were rampant in Manhattan.

Stars: James Franco, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Lawrence Gilliard Jr., Margarita Levieva

Votes: 22,982

Maggie Gyllenhaal, just because you can, doesn't mean you should.

14. Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)

R | 125 min | Drama, Romance, Thriller

46 Metascore

Literature student Anastasia Steele's life changes forever when she meets handsome, yet tormented, billionaire Christian Grey.

Director: Sam Taylor-Johnson | Stars: Dakota Johnson, Jamie Dornan, Jennifer Ehle, Eloise Mumford

Votes: 290,559 | Gross: $166.17M

Dakota Johnson was supposed to be "sexy"? :S

15. Take This Waltz (2011)

R | 116 min | Comedy, Drama

68 Metascore

A happily married woman falls for the artist who lives across the street.

Director: Sarah Polley | Stars: Michelle Williams, Seth Rogen, Sarah Silverman, Aaron Abrams

Votes: 26,642 | Gross: $1.24M

I used to fantasize about Sarah Silverman... not any more.

16. Snatched (2017)

R | 90 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy

45 Metascore

When her boyfriend dumps her before their exotic vacation, a young woman persuades her ultra-cautious mother to travel with her to paradise, with unexpected results.

Director: Jonathan Levine | Stars: Amy Schumer, Goldie Hawn, Kim Caramele, Raven Goodwin

Votes: 32,080 | Gross: $45.83M

Some plus-sized women look good. Amy Schumer does not.

17. Female Perversions (1996)

R | 120 min | Drama, Fantasy, Thriller

An ambitious female attorney wallows in excess and meaningless sex with both male and female partners, while dealing with her personal life problems including helping her kleptomaniac sister.

Director: Susan Streitfeld | Stars: Tilda Swinton, Amy Madigan, Karen Sillas, Frances Fisher

Votes: 2,265 | Gross: $0.88M

Tilda Swinton - not just a frightening face.

18. A Killer Within (2004)

R | 110 min | Thriller, Drama

Addison Terrill (Howell), a Dallas attorney, comes home one night to find his wife brutally murdered with the words "We're even now" scrawled across the bedroom wall. The cops suspect he ... See full summary »

Director: Brad Keller | Stars: C. Thomas Howell, Sean Young, Ben Browder, Dedee Pfeiffer

Votes: 703

Sean Young, please, no more.

19. Game of Thrones (2011–2019)

TV-MA | 57 min | Action, Adventure, Drama

Nine noble families fight for control over the lands of Westeros, while an ancient enemy returns after being dormant for millennia.

Stars: Emilia Clarke, Peter Dinklage, Kit Harington, Lena Headey

Votes: 1,678,248

Natalie Dormer disappoints everyone. Still waiting for Sophie Turner to do the same.

20. Color of Night (1994)

R | 121 min | Mystery, Romance, Thriller

36 Metascore

A color-blind psychiatrist Bill Capa is stalked by an unknown killer after taking over his murdered friend's therapy group, all of whom have a connection to a mysterious young woman that Capa begins having intense sexual encounters with.

Director: Richard Rush | Stars: Bruce Willis, Jane March, Rubén Blades, Lesley Ann Warren

Votes: 22,186 | Gross: $19.72M

Some people think Bruce Willis was the star of this movie. Others feel he had a very small part.

21. Bad Lieutenant (1992)

NC-17 | 96 min | Crime, Drama, Thriller

70 Metascore

While investigating a young nun's rape, a corrupt New York City police detective, with a serious drug and gambling addiction, tries to change his ways and find forgiveness and redemption.

Director: Abel Ferrara | Stars: Harvey Keitel, Brian McElroy, Frank Acciarito, Peggy Gormley

Votes: 37,215 | Gross: $2.00M

Harvey Keitel is scary for a number of reasons.



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