Memorable quotes for
"2 x 2 = Shinobuden" (2004)

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Onsokumaru: What the hell are we, trash? I wanna take a bath! Shinobu! Kaede! Where are you?!
Sasuke: Hey Onsokumaru, do you think we're burnable or non-burnable garbage?
Onsokumaru: I'm pretty sure we'll burn.
Sasuke: Huh.

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Sasuke: Who goes there!? Huh, I could have sworn I heard someone.
Onsokumaru: Heh. You fool, what do you take me for? If there had been someone outside, don't you think *I* would have noticed. I'll do a lap around Japan on a unicycle without a *seat* if I'm wrong.
Sasuke: Seriously? That's great. I'll write up the contract.

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Onsokumaru: Woo-hoo! Shop until you drop! Clothing accessories, illegal porn tapes and high school girls! So where do you think we should start?
Sasuke: Hey, hey, hey! You're a little too happy. You're babbling about illegal purchases.

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Shinobu: Now, now. Let's not fight while we're eating. My sundae's gone but would either of you like to taste my delicious, sweet cherry?

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Shinobu: Hey now. Onsokumaru, stop bothering everyone. You're such a bad boy.
Onsokumaru: Excuse me? Some breasts, a few sweet-and-sours kisses and a roomful of farts is *bad*? A *real* ninja must be prepared to face dangers such as these at all times.
Kaede Shiranui: I so don't understand him.

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[the ninjas are reading a dirty magazine]
Sasuke: Hey, I found a girl I like.
Ninja 1: Ooh, I'm gonna marry her.
Ninja 3: If only her boobs were a little bigger.
Ninja 2: All right, keep turning. Go to the next page already.
Sasuke: Wait, I'm not done reading her profile.

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Kaede Shiranui: You're *in* the way.
Onsokumaru: *This* is where *we* always play baseball! Besides, girls shouldn't even be in sports. Except maybe as cheerleaders, eye candy or beer girls.
Kaede Shiranui: What a tyrant. Unbelievable.
Onsokumaru: Me, a tyrant? What an incredibly rude thing to say. To make it up to me, let me touch your boobs.

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Onsokumaru: Stop laughin' will ya and just trust me. You'll live longer if you bathe with men.
Miyabi: Really? Is that true, sis?
Shinobu: Uh, is that true, Kaede?
Kaede Shiranui: I've never heard of such a bizarre theory.
Ninja 2: Ah, yes ladies, it's quite true. We've even got a letter from the Surgeon General saying so. Actually, it's really from my uncle Kazuhiko whom everyone calls Pervyhiko and I'm not sure why, though.

---

Onsokumaru: Well, it appears that you leave me no choice. Round up the men. We're going to have a guys versus girls baseball game. We'll turn those insolent girls into squishy-wishy sobbing babies.
Sasuke: All right! A new strike zone!

---

Ninja 1: That's a homerun for the girl's team!
Onsokumaru: Stop! Now wait just a minute here!
Ninja 1: What? You have a problem with my judgement as the umpire? Assistant umpire, *that's* a penalty.
Ninja 3: Yes sir!
Ninja 2: Well, look at this. It looks like the assistant umpire has made a stick to shove up his butt.
Onsokumaru: Dah, those stubby branches look like they'd be incredibly comfortable but, uh...
Ninja 2: Onsokumaru does not look too pleased with that penalty.

---

Onsokumaru: What is this?
Shinobu: Huh?
Onsokumaru: I wonder what's in here.
Kaede Shiranui: Hey! Leave it alone. That's the Christmas present I brought.
Onsokumaru: Oh wow, ten kiss tickets! I see some deep and heavy smooching in my future. It's so dirty. It's so filthy. I had no idea this person was such a pervert. Here ladies, this is a present I'd like to give you.
Kaede Shiranui: Yeah, yeah. Thanks but no thanks.

---

Shinobu: You're *amazing* Miyabi. You're so smart.
Ninja 2: Smarter than us.
Onsokumaru: I knew that! I knew that! And there's something *else* I know. Men are pointy and women are soft. They like to purr and go 'Meow.' So here I come baby! Come and get some fresh milk! You want it!
Ninja 1: Really, because I always kind of thought that, too.

---

Onsokumaru: Hmm, what's that?
Ninja 3: Ow! Ah! That's my butt!
Kaede Shiranui: It's been fun, but can you guys please leave now?
Sasuke: Did you hear that, Onsokumaru? What a terrible order. I can't believe how rude she is.
Onsokumaru: No, I couldn't understand her at all, actually. Apparently, this village only seems to speak the language of selfish priss.

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Onsokumaru: You know, you're just as bad as the instant cup ramen leftovers that get stuck in the drain after I empty out the hot water.
Sasuke: Really? That bad?

---

Shinobu: Wow, you're so amazing, Kaede. And you know what? You've just earned yourself a whole bunch of stamps on the stamp card inside my heart.
Kaede Shiranui: Great, but what's all this about a stamp card?

---

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